Why not elect Marion Barry? Why not make D.C. look like a laughing stock again? The city had only just started to recover from his reign of terror as mayor. So yeah, let's just bring his ass back.
How long until he's caught smoking crack again? Over-under: 1 year from now. Place your bets.
Why not? Part 2.
Why not repeal the D.C. gun ban?
I mean, sure, it's not anything that anybody in the District wants. And also, the murder rate had just started to decline, thanks to better policing.
But hey, who knows what's better for D.C., after all? The residents of the city? Or a bunch of sheltered, self-important, white Republicans representing non-urban areas?
Good job, Republicans. You take up that white man's burden. Repeal that handgun ban that D.C. residents instituted. Remove the prohibition against semiautomatic weapons. Remove registration requirements for ammunition and other firearms. Cancel those criminal penalities for carrying unregistered guns. That will solve everything. YOU'RE SO MOTHERFUCKING SMART. WHAT A FUCKING GREAT IDEA. THANK YOU SO VERY, VERY GODDAMNED MUCH.
Also, while you're at it, I suggest going one step further and allowing guns to be carried into Congress. It's a crime against freedom that American citizens can't carry a handgun into the House of Representatives... to protect themselves, of course. I'm sure nothing bad could possibly come of that, either.
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