Most Expensive Cabs in the Country? Fuck.

Well, all my bellyaching over the DC Taxi Commission's zone system yielded great results. The big bad zone system is finally dead! Meters for all! Huzzah!

Of course, it was kind of assumed that when we made the switch that the meter pricing wouldn't be so god damned expensive.

DC is going to have the most expensive taxis in the country. Fucking awesome. A four dollar drop rate, five dollars in rush hour!, is too much. That's in addition to the costs of waiting around in traffic and being charged $1.50 a mile.

As expected, meters will be cheaper on short rides and more expensive on longer trips. No surprise there. But, according to the Post, the shorter trips are only a little less expensive while long trips can get pricey in a hurry. Is that worth the transparency and reliability that meters provide? Maybe. Here's my solution:

A good way to make some of the money back is to ask your cabbie if they went on strike on Halloween. If they answer in the affirmative, I feel pretty comfortable not tipping them. Throwing a hissy fit and refusing to pick up people on one of the busiest drinking nights of the year was incredibly irresponsible. I'm a former union man and I respect a good strike, but this does not apply. This has "bad strike" written all over it.

Meters are going to be more expensive. Cabbies weren't striking for more money. They weren't striking for more autonomy since the prices were already set by the DC taxi Commission. They were striking to maintain the ability to rip commuters off. And for that I offer them a big hearty "fuck you." The three dollars I could have tipped them will buy me a delicious Schlitz at DC9 or a Yuengling at Red Derby. The owners of these fine establishments (srsly, Red Derby is fantastic) deserve the money more than someone willing to put public safety at risk just to keep a hopelessly corrupt system.

So, yeah, the meters are going to suck hard. It's worth it to me.


  1. Please note I don't particularly enjoy Schlitz or Yuengling. That's just what three dollars can buy you.

  2. Then why the hell did the taxi drivers stage a fucking strike on Halloween? They should be happy about this meter change because, in essence, very little is changing! Meanwhile, DC residents are getting fucked no matter how you slice or dice it. Fucking wonderful: we went from a bad setup right into another! Yay DC!! Whooo-hooo!! I hate fucking Fenty....he's such a moron. It figures this is the best deal he was able to negotiate for us. Thanks Fenty, you goddamn fuckstick.

  3. "We assumed it wouldn't be so expensive."

    Ummm, what do you mean "we" Kemosabe?

    I was fine with the zones, but come on, you didn't see this coming?

    Oh, and it's five bucks at rush hour. Plus more for extra passengers, luggage, etc.

    All for the pleasure of riding in a buick held together with duct tape.

  4. Be careful what you ask for, because you just might get it...this goes double in DC:
    I want a baseball team! (D'oh!)
    I want meters! (D'oh!)

    It just is what it is...generally the only times I take cabs are when work is paying for it, or I've been drinking and don't care how much it costs.

  5. Meters are still better.

    1. Trips that used to cross from one arbitrary zone to another could become very expensive even though the distance traveled was actually quite short. Meters fix this.

    2. Cabbies can't indiscriminately charge whatever the hell they want any more. For this fact alone the switch to meters is worthwhile.

    So stop bitching. Oh wait, this whole blog is nothing but bitching. And whiny bitching at that.

  6. Yo, please don't let the Red Derby cat out of the bag on your blog. It'd be nice if that place stayed asshole free a while longer.

  7. Meters also allow the workers of the city to charge our employers whatever we want for cab fars since no one will know who the hell much it costs to go from one place to another.

    (I kid I kid).

  8. I said it before, I'll say it again - if you're too stupid to ask the fare before you get in a zone cab, you deserve to be overcharged. Nice going ignoramuses...now we'll be paying more because you are completely lacking in common sense.

  9. Since the decision to switch to meters was announced I've asked every cab driver I've had what he thinks about the switch. Every one of them says they can't wait, because every ride is going to be more expensive for the passenger (especially when you're going longer distances or from inside to outside of the district). No more bargaining or haggling with customers because the customer will take whichever cab is there first since the price will (should) always be the same now.