Essay Contest Is Less Than a Dream Come True

Sorry to all the chumps who entered this essay contest. The idea was: pay $100, write a 75-word essay, have it judged by lawyers (who are, of course, the world's foremost experts on creative writing), and if you win, you win a house.

Seems that the contest was cancelled due to lack of interest (imagine that, nobody has $100 to blow). But don't worry, you'll still get a refund... a partial refund, that is! Ho-hooo! You've been SPITFIRE GRILLED, LOSERS!!!

Um, yeah.

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