Bring me the head of Bud Selig

Oh good. Major League Baseball commissioner and all-around cocksucker Bud Selig is back in town. Again.

Why are we treating him so nicely? There should be a local bounty on his head. In fact, let's do that right here: the first person in Washington to hit Bud Selig in the face with a banana cream pie gets dinner on me.

Seriously, a visit? Now?! What could baseball possibly be hoping to find out about Washington that they didn't already have knowledge of over the past three years?

"Capitol building still there?"
"Supreme Court still there?"

Bottom line: They would be stupid to put the Expos here after stalling for three whole seasons and losing millions of dollars. They would also be stupid to put a team anywhere else, since the other cities in contention aren't a sure thing in terms of TV market and potential support.

Meanwhile, the deadline's predictably been pushed back for about the 428th time. Enough already; time to start slashing Bud's tires. Let's go, people who violently riot at the slightest provocation (I'm looking at you, Maryland fans).

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