1. I totally wrote about this, like, a whopping five days ago. Indeed, those wacky Virginians sure love those wacky license plates. License plates serving as both car identification and as a shout-out to your favorite Phish song? You don't say? I kind of want to get a vanity plate so I can be just like them.
Other ways to be like a legitimate Virginian:
a. Hate gay people. Money quote:
The General Assembly further recognizes that both the United States Supreme Court in Lawrence v. Texas, 539 U. S. ___, 123 S. Ct. 2472, (2003), and the Massachusetts Supreme Court in Goodrich v. Department of Health, SJC 08860, March 4, 2003-November 18, 2003, failed to consider the beneficial health effects of heterosexual marriage, as contrasted to the life-shortening and health compromising consequences of homosexual behavior, and this to the detriment of all citizens regardless of their sexual orientation or inclination.
b. Hate black people. I think Virginia has that one taken care of. I mean, they keep electing a guy who had a Confederate flag and a hangman's noose in his office. I don't care how many apologetic resolutions he's passed regarding lynching, anyone who defends the Confederate flag is a racist in my book.
God, I hate Virginia and most Virginians. It's kind of unfair that Northern Virginians are more likely to read this than their Southwestern counterparts. I know it's not your fault, Northern Virginians.
Vanity plates and Phish are both lame though.
2. Speaking of lynching, I was ecstatic that Wonkette took aim at Richard Cohen's agonizing editorial regarding the "Digital Lynch Mob" of angry liberals. They did it better than I ever could. Which I guess is why they're actually paid to blog.
By the way, my hatred of Richard Cohen has nothing to do with any liberal bias. Hell, my favorite Post columnist is Charles Krauthammer. He's as conservative as they come. The problem with Richard Cohen is that he serves no purpose. He isn't funny. He doesn't represent a political viewpoint. He isn't a particularly great writer. He just sounds like a curmudgeon. He somehow became the poor man's Dana Milbank.
3. How fucked up was that Blogspot crash? Sorry if you couldn't get to this or the many other Blogspot blogs that are superior to this one.
4. New e-mail address! I changed the link on the homepage, but in case you have me in your address book or something, here's the new contact info: whyihatedc@gmail.com.
Original, eh? I have no idea why anyone would choose to Yahoo Mail. It's terrible.
5.09.2006
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Seriously Rusty, why are you hating on Virginia?
ReplyDeleteIt's not like we're all going around with stupid personalized tags. I submit that you're jealous because you are stuck on the Red Line instead of being able to tool around Northwest in your own little Mini Cooper with IH8DC on your rear bumper.
Why are you quoting from a two year old bill? That's like saying "Way to go DC, you elected a mayor that did crack and got caught." Or "Way to go DC, your mayor has silly gay bow ties." Ok, the last one's a little bit of a stretch, I understand, but still...
Next thing I know, you'll be hating on Maryland for that whole slavery thing.
PS - Quickie geography lesson. There are parts of VA that lie southEAST of northern VA too.
Leave me alone...I mean, I broke up the band, what else do you want me to do? Sue anyone in Virginia who uses one of my songs on their license plates? I'm too busy putting bumper stickers on cars up here in Burlington that say "I Lovermont".
ReplyDeleteDan, I know I'm being totally unreasonable. I used that particular bill since the part I quoted was especially egregious.
ReplyDeleteThat "homosexual lifestyle" is SO unhealthy.
ReplyDeleteI mean... when you look at all those clean-cut, educated, youthful-looking, muscular gay men, and then look at those flabby, overwieght, toothless, wife-beating straight Virginian men, I think we all know who will be living longer, more productive lives.
It's not like 2003 is the distant past. Did they admit that those bills are ridiculous and condemn the writer?
ReplyDeleteThat's a funny comment regarding gay men. What with all the "book-learning" I've been doing, the working out and the teeth-flossing, I'm afraid I'm giving ladies the wrong idea!
ReplyDeleteYeah, but at least those flabby, overwieght, toothless, wife-beating straight Virginian men aren't walking around with shit on their dicks. If you want to claim that sticking your schlong up some dude's poop shoot ain't unhealthy, you've got a few screws loose.
ReplyDeleteThanks, Labia Lover, for taking the sophistication of the discussion down a few notches.
ReplyDeleteGay people rule.
Labia? What about all the guys who fuck thier girls up the ass?
ReplyDeleteYeah, what about them? Its just as unhealthy. The difference is that most straight guys use the front door. Gay men have only one option.
ReplyDeleteIf being gay weren't unhealthy, why is AIDS scaring the shit out of the gay population? Why is it running rampant through the gay communities? Why are AIDS rallies predominently gay?
C'mon guys. I'm not trying to sound homophobic here, but just look at the facts.
Rusty, are you gay? (serious question)
ReplyDeletelistening to labia preach on homosexuality is like listening to a creationist trying to disprove evolutionary science. He's supremely confident in his opion, yet he has no idea what he's talking about.
ReplyDeleteEVER HEAR OF CONDOMS? OH WAIT-- You're from Hicktown, VA.
When the federal governemnt issues reccomendations that everyone age 13-65 be tested for AIDS as part of a routine medical checkup, does that mean straight people are just as unhealthy?
What about the crisis in Africa? Is everyone in Africa gay? Maybe we should blame it on black people? Or how about women since they're taking the brunt of the deaths there. AIDS walk doesnt include just gay people, dude. The Gay commmunity rallied around the AIDS issue because nobody else wanted to talk about it in the 80's and thier population was being decimated. And thank to ignorance like yours, AIDS is now a global, humanitarian crisis.
Gay men don't have only "one option." I think you have a homoerotic fixation on male-to-male anal sex. Come over to my house a for a night bro and I'll show a few things. I'd be happy to hold your head to the ground and shoot a nice warm load over your face.
Labia, I'd be happy to email with some facts and educate you further. I've even got pictures if you want them.
Finally, I doubt Rusty is gay... it's the homophobic guys like you who obsess over men having anal sex that are the sad, repressed gay men. When you're ready bro: http://www.outproud.org/brochure_coming_out.html
Rusty, I apologize for this post... won't tie up the comments section any further.
WTF?????? Do you realize what you just said?
ReplyDelete"The Gay commmunity rallied around the AIDS issue because nobody else wanted to talk about it in the 80's and thier population was being decimated."
THEIR POPULATION WAS BEING DECIMATED. Why the fuck do you think their population was being decimated, shit-for-brains? You said it yourself, and then deny that a gay lifestyle (without a condom) is unhealthy?
Are you really that fucking stupid?
You offer to shoot a nice warm wad all over my face, and then accuse me a being homophobic.
Okay, I guess you really are that fucking stupid. Dumbasses like you aren't even fun to argue with. Throw me a bone, dude. Give me something intelligent to debate.
Don't get a hard-on -- I said throw me a "bone", not a "boner"
Oh boy. Labia, your opinions on homosexuality are, well, they're wrong. I won't dismiss them though. A lot of otherwise smart people have issues with gays.
ReplyDeleteIn the 1980s, AIDS was just destroying gays. But today, AIDS is a problem for everyone. Worldwide, a huge majority of AIDS/HIV sufferers are heterosexual.
I can't be 100% sure about this (too lazy to research), but I was also under the impression that there are as many hetero-American AIDS patients as there were homosexual-American AIDS patients.
Also, if you're not comfortable around gays, that's your deal. But I hope you don't write off wonderful people just because of their orientation. I've found my gay friends/acquaintences to be great, wonderful, and warm people. The over-sexualized, super-feminine stereotype is just not accurate.
And, although this has no relevance to the debate, I am not gay. I went to first base with Toby from vividblurry.com once. That's the extent of my homosexual sexual experience.
This is so fucking typical. I make a comment that doesn't jive with what a few gay activists believe, and suddenly I'm homophobic. Completely expected.
ReplyDeleteExactly what part of my views on homesexuality are, well, wrong? I said that unprotected anal sex is unhealthy -- it's that simple. Really. Whether it be a man and a woman, or two men -- it makes no difference. If it weren't unhealthy, it wouldn't have "decimated" the gay population back in the eighties, WHICH YOU BOTH HAVE SAID. That does not make me a homophobe. It makes me someone who looks at THE FACTS and draws a conclusion. Gay men have more anal sex than straight men -- a FACT.
If, like you say, there are as many hetero-American AIDS patients as there were homosexual-American AIDS patients is true, then that is just another fact that supports my stance. You fail to throw into the mix the percentage of Americans who actually are gay.
I expect this argument from the anonymous moron who contradicted himself and offered to unload his manhood on my face, but I thought you were smarter than that, Rusty.
Unprotected gay sex is more of a health risk than unprotected heterosex. Are you guys really denying that?
Well, you're right. Anal sex is more dangerous since it's much easier to contract a disease. But you're assuming that gay men have as much anal sex as straight man. I don't think that's true. Anal sex is super-prevalent in heterosexual relationships and to assume that all gay men engage in anal sex is just crazy.
ReplyDeleteAIDS decimated the gay population in the 1980s since an activity that used to be safe, unprotected anal sex, was now dangerous.
Your claim that AIDS is currently destroying homosexuals is not true. People have adapted to use condoms and, ta da, the problem is being solved.
And I know this to be true: AIDS is increasing in the hetero community and decreasing in the homosexual community. So, to say homosexuality is more dangerous is untrue. Was it dangerous to be gay? Yes. Not anymore.
dude.... ANY unprotected sex is risky. And statistically, WOMEN having unprotected hetro sex is riskier than two men having gay sex.....
ReplyDeletehttp://www.cdc.gov/hiv/resources/factsheets/At-A-Glance.htm
BUT that's just HIV/AIDS. what about the other STD's:
http://www.avert.org/stdstatisticusa.htm
(notice that southern states rank rather high for infections.)
Now that you know the facts, Labia, would you be supportive of banning hetrosexaul sex?
Boy, you guys sure know how to spin things, don't you?
ReplyDeleteUnprotected homosexual anal sex is more dangerous than unprotected hetero vaginal sex. Most straight men have vaginal sex, and nearly all gay men (if having intercourse) have anal sex. The problem here is that since the advent of the protease inhibitors, too many gay men have gone back to unprotected sex. Part of it is complacency, and part of it is "the thrill". The risk actually increases the intesity of the sex. Now THAT'S some sick shit.
Sure there are other STD's but they generally DON'T KILL YOU, like AIDS does.
rusty, I don't believe I said that AIDS is destroying homosexuals.
Also, if you look at the AIDS rallies, and the AIDS activists, they are predominantly gay. C'mon guys -- you still want to claim that a homosexual lifestyle is as healthy as a hetro one?
Okay, I'll concede that not all gays are living unhealthy lifestyles, but statistically speaking, it is more unhealthy to be a "practicing" gay, than a hetero. If that weren't the case, AIDS wouldn't still be scaring the shit out of the gay community, and they wouldn't be the ones lobbying for more funding for AIDS research.
I'm sure Virginias feel much the same, honestly, about nosey bloggers who don't live and aren't from Virginia tossing out opinions about their state. I grew up in Southern VA, lived in Northern VA for four years and now live in DC. Most of the state isn't gay hating or racist. Just the people who care enough to vote. And frankly, Virginia has yet to ban gay marriage (yes, I'm aware they are trying), but they are behind what, seven to twelve other states that already have? In case you didn't know, that "liberal" state Maryland is well on its way to doing just that as well. And when did DC allow gay marriage?
ReplyDeleteSo you point out one person elected who's a bigoted asshole and that is somehow a generalization on all Virginians. My family still lives in Southern Va. They are not racist or homophobic. So I guess if one example is enough, I have several so therefore I'm right and you're wrong.
also labia lover - you're a moron.
ReplyDeletegay people were decimated by AIDS in the 80s because they got it first. the reason why it did not filter into the heterosexual community as fast is because transmission from a woman to a man is FAR more difficult than from a MAN to a MAN or a MAN to a WOMAN. Not impossible, just more difficult. A great majority of gay man are versatile and therefore are giving and receiving anal sex, therefore spreading the virus more rapidly than in straight populations. Women cannot "top" men and since men sleeping with women without using protection has lower transmission possibility than men screwing other men who then screw other men, it spread faster among gays. It has nothing to do with anal sex being "healthy" or "unhealthy". It has to do with a virus. And the presence and transmission capabilities of HIV. As for STDs, straight people get them just as often...herp, chlamydia, gon, etc etc. Why? Because transmission is two way with a man/woman couple. It's easier to get. Does it mean vaginal sex is unhealthy? Yeah, if there's a disease up in there. Protected anal sex is just as "healthy" as any other kind of sex. Period.
You crack me up. You preach about how gay sex is no more unhealthy than hetero sex, but all your posting does is state how gay sex transmits HIV easier than straight sex. Dude, what fucking planet are you on?
ReplyDeleteAnd if you want to split hairs, anal sex with a condom IS more risky than vaginal sex with a condom. Condoms can rupture. Happens all the time.
OK, for the last time anal sex does not equal gay sex. It just doesn't. Men and women fuck each other in the ass all the time.
ReplyDeleteI understand your point. I really do. But being gay is no less healthy than being straight if you're in a responsible relationship, which is the whole idea of marriage.
And Earl, I'm working on an entire post based on your comment. Good work.
HIV statistics for 2004:
ReplyDeleteMale to male sexual contact: approx 18,000 cases
Heterosexual sexual contact: approx 14,000 cases
Source: Newsweek Magazine
You two can deny this till you are blue in the face, but you cannot deny the facts.
Rusty said:"...anyone who defends the Confederate flag is a racist in my book."
ReplyDeleteI'm racially-conscious to be sure. And I don't apologize for being White and conscious of how current events impact White people, either. If that equates to 'racist' by you, then tough - I feel your pain.
You may respond to the defense of things Southron with ad hominem slurs all you like; I've come to expect that from those lacking critical thinking skills.
The flag of the Union flew over as many as THIRTY-THREE slave states from the inception of the US until the secession of 1860 (84 years!) but you want to get all weepy-eyed that the Confederate flag flew over ELEVEN states for less than five. Oh, my bleeding heart. (And let's not forget that slavery was accepted in ALL of the colonies since 1619. The Thirteenth Amendment was passed in 1865, so we have a whopping 240 years that slaves had been on American soil and YOU'RE going to bellyache that the Confederacy had them for five...Preach on, preach on!)
Anonymous said:"listening to labia preach on homosexuality is like listening to a creationist trying to disprove evolutionary science."
But remember that the 'science' will always be a 'theory'. (And alot of scientists have more 'blind faith' in this theory than some Christians I know.)
Anonymous said:"dude.... ANY unprotected sex is risky. And statistically, WOMEN having unprotected hetro sex is riskier than two men having gay sex.....http://www.cdc.gov/hiv/resources/factsheets/At-A-Glance.htm"
(From that link:)
"By Exposure
In 2004, the largest estimated proportion of HIV/AIDS diagnoses were for men who have sex with men (MSM), followed by adults and adolescents infected through heterosexual contact."
Whoops! Don't post sources you don't want verified...'dude'!
Rusty said:"But you're assuming that gay men have as much anal sex as straight man. I don't think that's true. Anal sex is super-prevalent in heterosexual relationships and to assume that all gay men engage in anal sex is just crazy.
I assume gay men have MORE (not 'as much') anal sex as straight men because my gay friends tell me they do! And they also have incredible numbers of partners. Scary!
I can personally attest that straight guys don't do the poop shootery very often. (I have straight friends that concur.) Vaginal sex is WONDERFUL as it grips you simultaneously from head to base. I've given the 'rough ride' to a few girls but the pleasure from a man's standpoint is constrained to wherever the rectum makes contact with the penis. (aka 'the Harvey Wallbanger' effect.)
Anonymous said:"Women cannot "top" men.
Au contraire! Actually, most women PREFER to 'top' their man. It makes them feel 'in control'(And me being lazy, have no problem accomodating their whims...)
Labia Lover said:"HIV statistics for 2004:
Male to male sexual contact: approx 18,000 cases
Heterosexual sexual contact: approx 14,000 cases
And I believe there are less homosexual men than hetero; I cringe to imagine what this works out to on a per capita basis...