On Friday I met up with Toby after work. We met at the Rosslyn Metro Station so we could get some good seats at the Aimee Mann show. The Birchmere website said the best way to find the venue was to take the Metro to Pentagon City and cab it from there. Naturally, the Metro would not cooperate.
When we found each other on Rosslyn's lower platform, the next train wasn't scheduled to arrive for 11 minutes. And this was during rush hour. I was paying an increased fare to wait 11 minutes. Awesome.
Of course, 11 minutes was a bit optimistic. After five minutes all three trains on the board disappeared. When they reappeared the number had jumped back to eight. Then they disappeared again. Finally, we got the dreaded announcement that there were Blue/Orange Line delays and that we might be sitting around for a while. Toby, who Ana Marie Cox once credited with mastering the "semi-annual Metro rant," and I had had enough. We decided to bolt.
And what luck! The elevator to the street was open and ready for our entrance. Run, Toby, run! Alas, we just missed it. Oh well. The two of us decided to wait for the elevator. We were accompanied by an older woman in a pink shirt. While we were checking out the new maps that show you where all the buses go from Rosslyn (a map Toby called "suspiciously informative"), the woman in pink was frantically pushing the elevator's up button. With every passing second she would press that button while mumbling to herself. This woman had places to be. What an affront to have to wait underground!
Finally the woman gives up. "What is up with this town!?" she yells to no one in particular. She hops the Metro gate and makes the long, sad trip up the escalator. No more than 15 seconds later, the elevator arrives and we were on our way.
"What is up with this town!?" I wish I knew, lady. I wish I knew.
If you were wondering, Aimee Mann was fantastic.