LOOK AT IT!
This club means one thing. That I am better than all the losers who go to Science Club or Local 16.
I too drink on my parent's credit card (and use their connections at work, and brag about the high school where they sent me, and insist on "qualifying" strangers by demanding their opinions on South American politics). But I know it's important to spend my parent's money at a place where real people go.
People with tattoos.
I don't have tattoos because you never know how a career in politics will end up. (Also, the parents are still paying the bills...) But I am still very real. Because I understand the MEANING of the tattoos, man.
Besides, someday soon I might pierce something that won't show.
I have a fixed gear bike. I ride it to work sometimes. And I can remember way back - three, four years ago - when all the poseurs hadn't moved to town yet. Me and my friends talk about these things at this bar on H Street. A lot. That makes me almost local.
We don't dance because dancing is for frat boy losers.
I came with some frizzy haired girls who also know a lot about South American politics. But I will ignore them and spend all night hitting on the hot chick, who must be stupid. I will ask her about South American politics. If she knows the president of Chile and mentions this month's (ok this WEEK'S) Economist, I will get uncomfortable. I will start to brag about how I might pierce something and she wouldn't understand.
When her tattooed friends show up, I will lie and say I will be right back. Then I will go back to my friends and tell them there are no cool chicks here. The frizzy haired girls will roll their eyes and leave.
I will get more and more drunk. The bartender will start giving me watery drinks. I will stiff him, as punishment. Then I will brag about it to all my friends. Stupid bartender. I'll bet he just moved here.
When the bartender kicks me out, I will stumble down the street. Someone with tattoos will feel guilty about me being obvious mugger bait, and will stand near me while I wait for a cab. I will bum a smoke from him. I am real like that.
The next day, I will ask everyone if they've been to my club before, and look disappointed when they say yes. I will quiz them on when, EXACTLY, they started going there because I am sure I found the club first. Once this point is settled, I will be comfortable again. I will tell them about my plans to pierce something. Soon.