I realized it's been a while since I had checked the Late Night Shots forums. Ever since Wonkette started giving them a hard time, the "shockingly offensive" statements kind of dropped off. Luckily I was bored this morning and I caught a discussion on "Take Back the Night" festivities.
(If you don't know, Take Back the Night is when a bunch of women march on campuses with candles chanting anti-sexual assault slogans. It's meant to raise sexual assault awareness. I think it's a little silly and would rather see people focus their efforts on rape prevention and victim counseling, but it's a good cause with good intentions.)
Apparently, some dudes at Late Night Shots are not keen on the idea of women marching on campus to protest sexual assault. Here are some choice quotations from the forum*:
~Did anyone else have a bunch of girls with candles hold one these outdoor parties in their honor during college? I'm pretty sure they wanted to take back the night I blacked out and took them down in my frat love den. Grrrr.
~A better solution would be to promote going to AA - then these silly take back the night vigils wouldn't occur and inconvenience everyone
~I'm a woman, and I certainly don't think sexual violence and rape is funny. But the feminazis holding the candles are just jokes.
I personally like the idea of any woman protesting rape being called a feminazi. Way to heighten the discourse, LNS.
~...Not that I condone sexual assault, but what a man or woman does in a drunken haze then "regrets" the next morning is NOT sexual assault.
Sexual assault is the forcible or unwanted sexual contact with another without their consent.
I hardly see how holding candles and making false allegations to nameless faces will address the true problem.
Not to sound harsh, but may be some of these "supposed" victims should wear more clothing or avoid "high action" areas.
I feel it detracts from the real victims who actual need help.
The emphasis is mine. I especially like this statement because it's not an attempt at (unfunny) shock humor. This guy is serious. And he is woefully misguided. What an asshole.
~Aren't the girls who get "taken advantage of" just the less than hot chicks that dudes dont respect?
~Take Back the Night is when all the PCU-like hippies, emos, and other dregs of society come out of the woodwork.
The worst part is seeing those sanctimonious guys who think they're going to finally touch a vag because they're actively and passionately involved in the event (passing out ribbons, giving speeches, "raising awareness") - they are akin to my recent post about girls' friends that are Benedict Arnolds/Silent Assassins and should be held in the same contempt.
I guess I am a Benedict Arnold for being anti-rape. Fuck. Did I just lose my man card?
~Again, these take back the nighters need to go to AA and not this rally. The problem is that it is pretty much asking for it if you stumble into a frat-bash after party at 3am and jump into bed with some guy who you thought was your boyfriend in Sigma Chi but you somehow ended up at SAE instead - and no, that's not Johnny Wonderful lying next to you the morning after.
According to some people active in LNS, alcohol = consent. Cleavage = consent. Parties = consent. These guys need to be kicked in the balls. Hard.
~Nevertheless, the fact remains that several false accusations deter the credibility of actual assaults. I think what a girl wears is demonstrative of her intent. I do not think any rationale person can say that if a girl is my fraternity house at 3AM that she has any intent to do anything but something that is sexual in nature. However, she does reserve the right to say no at all times. However, if her friends are pulling her away and she insist on staying that could be grounds for espousing how she wants to end the night. Absent a contract, which is not enforceable in a court of law, consensual intercourse is a sticky subject.
A college girl, or otherwise, leaves her unwilling victim at the mercy of her regretability. When proof is scant, as it often is, circumstantial evidence and the intent of both parties is necessary to prove whether the sexual contact was consensual.
It is foreseeable to say that if a girl wears almost nothing she is not per se "asking for it" but reasonable minds could differ on her willingness. Moreover, what stops a girl from say "yes" in the morning and then realizing that her sorority sisters saw her with guy #5 and she is thus labeled a slut.
Now, she could remedy that situation by saying that guy #5 assaulted her. What is fundamental about this discussion is that a girl's sexual promiscuity, her attire, and demeanor (before and after) the event is tantamount to deciding whether she in fact did or did not consent. I believe the Kobe Bryant example is a case in chief. The Duke case speaks volumes as well.
Ahhh! Oh my God! I didn't think people still thought like this! This is crazy. Mind-blowingly crazy.
I met some of the founding members of LNS when I went to their Election Night Party. They were very nice and they said they wanted to clean up the forums so they can look more respectable. That obviously didn't work out. There are active members in this organization who disrespect women and women's sexuality. I hate to be this crude (especially knowing that my parents will read this), but the guys leaving these comments clearly see college women as little more than cumbuckets. A warm place to put their dicks. And if they're wearing a low cut shirt at a frat party, it's not like they're going to mind, right?
I understand that being falsely accused of sexual assault or date rape is very, very, very scary for men. But lots of women are assaulted. I'm willing to bet that almost all of my readers have had (or currently have) a friend that has been sexually assaulted. I don't think candlelight vigils are the best way to bring attention to this, but I also don't think that mocking these women is in any way acceptable. Late Night Shots should be ashamed of itself.
*That forum is only open to members. Want to be a member and join in the fun? E-mail me and ask for an invite.