4.03.2007

LSS is Back in the Post Spewing Nonsense

Thanks to the commenter who pointed this article out to me.

That's right, folks. LSS is back writing in the Post. Perhaps her book tour is done?

(I got 225 pages into Unhooked before giving up. It's not just wrong-headed, it's awful. The last straw was when an example of a good parent was someone who wouldn't let her daughters, who were Haitian, hang out with other black kids because their families were "low class and lacked ambition." Seriously. It's on page 211. That was one of the few examples of a good parent. Unbelievable. You can only read so much about super-wealthy kids and their difficulties making connections with people before you go stark raving mad.)

This article, however, isn't that bad. It's about female college students being wary about getting the new HPV vaccine. It's expensive and it's a hassle and yada, yada, yada. I mean, I've read this a story about a thousand times since the HPV vaccine was approved by the FDA. I guess the Post expects their crack reporter on teenage sexuality to shine some new light on the issue. Which, I guess she does. I had no idea that, even when used correctly, condoms only have a 70% effectiveness rate against HPV. After almost a year of making fun of her, I finally learned something.

Of course all good will generated by LSS is destroyed by this sentence:
Some assume that hookup partners who can afford popped-collar shirts and expensive jeans are not the kind of guys who would be infected.

It doesn't cost extra money to pop the collar! Watch this. I just popped my collar. And now I'm unpopping it. I DID NOT HAVE TO PAY A COLLAR TAX! Argh. Can you imagine a girl not using protection because the guy had a popped collar? That hypothetical chick deserves HPV.

I will say this: It's good to have LSS back in the fold. I look forward to criticizing every single thing she publishes. Forever.

20 comments:

  1. Wow. wow. wow. Her article was TODAY and not Sunday right? Not another fool's joke? Jesus. Don't they have editors at The Post?

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  2. Oh LSS... conventional wisdom is that the guys carrying the most STD's are the ones wearing the popped collars. She would know that if she spent any time with REAL kids and not just the dude behind the counter at A&F.

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  3. As soon as I read "on the campus of George Washington University" in the lede, I quit. Interview some regular college students, for god's sake.

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  4. Oh, and she has a chat today. Somebody go tear into her.

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  5. Wow, that is fucking ridiculous. "Jeez! These kids with their expensive popped collars! When I was a kid we kept our collars down and we liked it that way!"

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  6. let me clarify as to the popped collars; this lss chiquita obviously has a relative grasp on fashion in that it is only "appropriate" to pop the collars of certain shirts, such as chartreuse izod polos; as opposed to al borden-flannels. she ought to drop the sex column in favor of chasing the glory of the joan rivers way, because she demonstrates on very basic levels an aptitude for outfit observation. also, after reading some of her ripe-with-righteousness coital commentary, i can only assess that the poor woman more likely than not has cobwebs all up in her vag. muffin.

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  7. OK, for those of us remaining three DC white collar professionals who can't bring ourselves to use dry cleaners ... exactly WTF is a POPPED COLLAR? and how does it differ from, say, just a collar? Inquiring minds and all...

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  8. timmy loved judas priest!!!!!April 04, 2007

    Timmy loved Judas Priest!!!!!

    We almost legal drinking age now you bitches!!!

    Only 58 more days to go!

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  9. Anonymous, popping a collar is when you flip your collar up. That's it. No middle man necessary. For some reason, LSS thinks it signifies status. What it actually signifies is asshattery.

    ~Rusty

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  10. Be careful, your HPV info is not accurate. you should direct ppl to NIH website, or the www.medlineplus.gov

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  11. I'm a dude. I don't need to know a damn thing about HPV.

    Haha, kidding. The only thing I wrote about HPV is that condoms don't do a great job of preventing it. That's from LSS's article, so it's totally within the realm of possibility that that's wrong.

    ~Rusty

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  12. Well, that's just plain bad writing. Huh. How do I apply for a job at the Washington Post?

    I'm sure you don't have to take a urinalysis.

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  13. llibrarianApril 04, 2007

    No worries, I hear you. It is a complicated issue. Just trying to pimp more authoritative correct info.

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  14. Big R. Why aren't you on this list?

    http://www.insideedition.com/spotlights/dcbachelors/default.aspx

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  15. Good I'm glad the news is out... I went to a party the other day and I saw a guy with his collar popped... so I discreetly went up to him and put his collar down… he looked back at me quickly and I told him “Hey man just helping you out… your collar looked like you had it popped… you don’t want any one thing you have STDs now do you?”… He gave me kind of as strange look, then I said, “glad I could help out” then I went and hit a blunt with the happiness that I really helped out somebody…

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  16. Popped collars are also a symptom of hardcore guidoism:

    http://www.getoffourisland.com/

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  17. Hey Rusty Trombone - Did you see this piece in the Post today about how the DC's area has levelled off? People are finally starting to get it! DC sucks ass and they are leaving as fast as they come.

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  18. Dude- I don't know why the Post wastes their time with such awful writers-- from LSS to Jessica Dawson. I am worried they are becoming a bit lame and unprogressive as a result. I think there was an article about this...something along the lines of what happened to the POST, they were the ones to expose White What and over throw a presidential administration...but now they're just well, lame.

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  19. WIHDC, I think the idea of a popped collar tax is a great idea! With all the over-indulged kids around town, we could raise enough money to re-open the hospital!! WOOT! "Pop your collar for a poor person!"

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  20. I think LSS has been hanging out at the Herpes Triangle again..err..Third Edition, I mean.

    She's getting ideas about popped collars..

    What happens when the Waterfront opens and she starts seeing all the pink J.Crew belts with little green whales on them???

    You know what they say about men who wear cutesy animals on their clothing.

    Syphilis.

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