(Alternate Title: In Which I Waste an Entire Post to Make Fun of My Mom)
Two weeks ago I wrote a post bemoaning the Wolf Trap summer schedule for being excessively crappy. Crappy for everyone except for my mother who appears to be the key demographic that the Wolf Trap is going after. Between Hootie and Blowfish and Huey Lewis and the News, my mom's favorite bands were well represented.
Well, Wolf Trap updated their schedule. The good news is that the acts are a little better. I know plenty of people who will go ga-ga over Morrissey. I'm a bit excited for The B-52's. Although I'd be a little shocked if Cindy can still hit the high notes on "Roam." What can I say? Cosmic Thing was one of the first albums I ever listened to.
The bad news is that this schedule looks more and more like it was chosen by my mother. The Neville Brothers? Frankie Valli? k.d.lang? West Side Story? It's like all the shit I had to endure in my youth is coming back to haunt me. My mom would go apeshit to see any one these acts.
The cherry on this sundae though is the inclusion of The Moody Blues. I hate the Moody Blues so very much. Why? Full disclosure: my mom used to be a Moody Blues groupie. Well, that's conjecture. But the way she speaks of them in such a reverent tone makes it plausible conjecture. I think she actually memorized the poem after "Nights in White Satin." That's weird and sick.
So, readers, what's your thought on the Wolf Trap schedule? I say it's still shitty, but no more or less shitty than anything any other local outdoor venue has to offer this summer.
4.09.2007
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Dude, having grown up in this area, I really don't remember Wolf Trap being anything other than a haven for late-30-somethings to listen to boring music at. It's always been sort of central to the places' identity. Sort of like an outdoor Birchmere.
ReplyDeleteI'm not sure why you're surprised at this.
I know, I know. I just had such a good time at their previous concerts that I wish they'd throw me a bone.
ReplyDeleteCosmic Thing? You're a baby. Go back to Quiche Lorraine. And yes, why in the hell do expect more. I say you take your Mom to that concert and enjoy it. She did give birth to you. If she was a groupie of the Moody Blues that might explain you too!
ReplyDeleteI expect a family visit in August or September and if their trip coincides with one of these acts, of course I'll take her.
ReplyDeleteGeez, I'm not a monster. Just poking some fun.
Rusty, thanks for the link to the Nights lyrics. What a horrendous song, especially the midi keyboard version.
ReplyDeleteI had forgotten about the weird "voice over" at the end of that musical triumph. "Senior Citizens wish they were young" is such poetry! Does that section remind anyone else of the wonderous "rap" that Vincent Price does at the end of Thriller?
This doesn't affect me much since I almost never go to Wolf Trap anyway. I admit I'd like to see Morrissey and the B52s, but it will never happen. My only real complaint with the schedule is the two things that we actually decided to see (PHC and The Mikado) are two weekends in a row. There's no chance we'll be able to get a babysitter and organize ourselves to go to Wolftrap two freaking weekends in a row! So we're going to the live broadcast of PHC, and I guess instead of seeing The Mikado I'll watch "Topsy Turvy" again. Lollerskates.
ReplyDeleteBest Wolftrap show I ever saw: Mojo Nixon & Skid Roper/The Pogues/The Violent Femmes, summer 1989. Good times.
ReplyDeleteGeez, I'm not a monster. Just poking some fun.
ReplyDeleteLOL.
You mock ELDERLY bands but many of your favorite present day bands do nothing original. In fact they rip off boomers. They try to dress they way baby boomers did back in the day and they try to rock the way baby boomers did back in the day but they dont even come close. They all suck. GENERATION Y is the least musicaly talented generation in history.
ReplyDeleteHate on the boomers all you want RUSTY but the fact remains that your worthless generation has produced nothing! BRITNEY SPEARS along with an endless supply of shitty annoying EMO bands. Billions of thug rapper trash. Retarded nu-metal garbage combined with wannabe retro rocker hipster bands that do nothing but rip off bands from the 60's and 70's. Dont even get me started on JUSTIN FUCKING TIMBERLAKE!!!!!!!!
ReplyDeleteHate all you want, but Justin Timberlake rules. Music aside, you should thank him just for putting Britney Spears into a career-killing tailspin.
ReplyDelete...and he's fucking hot.
ReplyDeleteUntil your generation does something relevant in music (which is unlikely to happen anytime soon) you have no right to mock the old farts and their music.
ReplyDeleteThe 60's and 70's rocked.
The 2000's suck.
Justin Timberlake is a fucking joke.
If Justin Timberlake is one of the best that the 2000's can offer well then the world must truly be coming to an end.
ReplyDeleteFuck GENERATION Y.
There's usually at least one good thing each summer. Not this time.
ReplyDeleteWhy were the 1970's so FUN and LEGENDARY?
ReplyDeleteBoomers.
Why are the 2000's so fucking lame and why does this decade fucking suck?
Generation Y.
hey, truth speaker...
ReplyDeletemaybe if you made an effort to listen to new music beyond what you see on MTV or VH1 and beyond what you hear on the radio, you'd find something worth listening to (maybe try listening to some online indie rock stations, read some indie mags, get recommendations, etc. you have to seek out good music). everyone knows today's pop music is shit. you're preaching to the choir. and get over the fucking 60s and 70s already. it brought just as much, if not more, shitty disposable music right along with the good stuff. so suck it, gramps. you probably like the allman brothers. i'm embarrassed for you.
on another note: morrissey is grossly overcharging on this tour.
I don't buy the reflexive idea that all music today is worse than that from the 60s and 70s. The stuff that gets mass media exposure today is crap, but there was a lot of crap back then, too.
ReplyDeleteRecord companies today really only market lowest-common-denominator, sure-fire-million record sellers, which are almost guaranteed to suck. We seem to blame this on Gen Y's "lack of creativity". Of course, the money men at all those record companies - the guys deciding what to sell - are probably all boomers themselves.
So nice job there, boomers - lay claim to some sort of artistic heydey, then get rich selling schlock to the masses, THEN feel superior to the kids and their crappy taste. Nice gig ya got there.
Effing hypocrites.
Indie bands. Indie blogs. Indies shaggy haired douchebags from the 2000's. If it werent for the 60's and 70's then all those indie retards from today would have nobody to ripoff and steal ideas from. You jackass.
ReplyDeleteALL bands are derivative of something, you dumbass. Unless they're on stage with a kazoo, a trash can lid, a unicycle wheel and a cat in heat, everyone has a noticeable influence.
ReplyDeleteLike Elvis, Led Zeppelin, etc. didn't rip off all the black blues musicians? Like the Sex Pistols and the movement they inspired weren't basically a gimmick created by McClaren? Yeah, they completed invented a new sound. Okay, dingus.
You still like the Allman Brothers. And you still don't have a valid point. Each decade is filled with pop-crap. You just have to find the bright spots.
Go fuck yourself and your EVERYBODY IS INFLUENCED BY SOMEBODY bullshit. That is just an excuse many bands of today use to get around the fact that they are blatantly ripping off the past without having to fully admit to it. It goes beyond the music too. Just take a look at how many of those indie idiots dress. What a fucking joke. But that is okay too because they were influenced to dress that way. GET THE FUCK OUT OF HERE. I am going to move to Friendship Heights and start my own blog and hate on DC. Nothing wrong with that right? I am a Rusty nutswinger and he has deeply influenced me in all of my decisions including spending $200+ on drinks over in Georgetown this past weekend.
ReplyDeleteKeith Richards, Jimmy Page and so on pulled their sound from black blues artists. You have yet to refute this point.
ReplyDeleteSo: you've already proven that you can't deny that the "old favorites" weren't influenced, too. And the funny thing is, those people were less likely to acknowledge the folks who influenced them. Yet I don't see you faulting them for it, Allman.
You still have no valid point. Sorry.
I think you're giving me a hard time because you're under the impression that I don't like the classics. I do. They're some of my favorites. But you need to stop living in the past.
I can't wait until the Boomers croak and stop boring us with their self-righteous babble. Now that Brokaw's WWII "greatest generation" have all bit it or are totally senile, the Boomers want their asses totally licked too. So we have to act like they gave us something worthwhile other than acid and the Pill.
"Just take a look at how many of those indie idiots dress."
ReplyDeleteOh yeah, 'cuz the 70s were a freaking golden age of style. Please.
Well somebody should tell those indie idiots that their 60's and 70's fashion statements are getting tired really fast.
ReplyDeleteman, i miss the glory days of metal. and ska. two totally different genres, but at least nobody complained.
ReplyDeleteoutside of the comment thread, if you think That's bad why don't you look over the melody tent's ever-deteriorating lineup? that ought to cheer you up. in pertinence; what the hell is the matter with My generation? i happen to think just about everyone getting all worked up needs a smack in the double standard. jesus. i tell my mother i like vivaldi and she laughs and says he wrote the same piece over and over. point being? nothing is original. anyone the least bit familiar with musical theory is well aware that every piece of music ever written (just like every story ever written) follows one of seven melodies (or plotlines, as it were) so can't we all just admit human limitation? seems we can get to forgetting to reel in the ego when we blast around with a sword and shield of blog. idiots.
ReplyDeleteand oh yeah, thats one saaaaaad lineup.
btw, what is a "rusty nutswinger"?
ReplyDeleteConsider yourself lucky.
ReplyDeleteMy Mom listens to Clay Aiken.