I'm resigning

That's it. I hereby quit my post as the resident WMATA apologist. Sorry guys, but Thursday took the cake.

The sheer hilarity of February 19, 2009 will hopefully forever be remembered as Black Thursday by John Catoe. It was a rough enough morning, with the Orange Line single-tracking from Clarendon to Foggy Bottom, and the Blue Line single tracking from Arlington Cemetery to Farragut West. A vacuum truck or some such lost a wheel and derailed, damaging the track. Had this been the only thing that happened, knowing me, I would have said "Awww but Metro got it fixed by 2PM, it's not that bad!"

But then, as they are removing the broken vacuum train, it derails AGAIN, 10 minutes later, outside East Falls Church. Right before rush hour. Yeah, that damn vacuum truck.

It was bad enough that the vacuum truck derailed, but then at 6:15, at the tail end of rush hour, an empty Yellow Line train derailed at Mt. Vernon Square. More single tracking, interrupting COUNTLESS BLOGGERS as they travel north on the Green Line to U Street, Columbia Heights, and Petworth. THE HORROR.

But really, I can only imagine Catoe's reaction when his Blackberry goes off at 6:15 saying there is yet ANOTHER derailment.

Bad things come in threes, I know, but there's not a whole lot of excuse for having something derail twice. In the span of what, maybe 2 miles?


Thankfully I wasn't impacted by these delays, I rode the bus home. I bet M@ was pissed, 'cept he probably drives to work.

Maybe it's all a ploy to try and get more stimulus dollars.


  1. Yeah, my drive to work takes ten minutes. I don't miss the Orange Line one bit.

    Toward the end of my time commuting into the city by Orange Line, I had to go to the doctor to get some chill pills.

    Yup, I reverse the commute and drive 80-90 on the highway. It's sweet.

  2. I blame the LATINOS.

  3. This blog needs to step it up. The underground rail system service of a small city was delayed for a few hours? Earth shattering...

  4. Perhaps Anonymous has some editorial suggestions to send?

  5. "the highway?" is that some kind of midwest transplant term? we refer to roads by their actual names here in the DC area. it kind of sounds like you're describing 66, except there is no way you're driving 80-90 on 66 inside the beltway even on a reverse commute.

  6. no, the proper midwest term is "expressway" i believe.

    and yes, anonymous, this post was rather weak. however, please not the hilarity of the WMATA roomba derailing twice.

  7. looks like our swathmore professor has reemerged. i know you haven't been in dc long enough to understand, but yes, the metro breaking down here is a big deal.

  8. I blame the BLACKS.

  9. I blame the WHITEBOYS who wear tight/skinny/slim jeans.

  10. "Perhaps Anonymous has some editorial suggestions to send?"

    How about you, @sshole?

    I thought you "walk" to DC across the Key Bridge?

    Wait, you don't work in DC either? You live and work in Virgina?(sic)

    If that is the case, get the fuck off this blog, @sshole.

  11. somebody apparently had a heart attack at the shaw station this afternoon and trains were delayed for like five minutes. WMATA can handle massive fail, but only when its human life fail.

  12. Anonymous,

    I live just across the bridge and I can and do run into D.C. over it. I have worked in many, many institutions in the District and in Northern Virginia. Until recently, I DID work in the District.

    D.C. is D.C. is D.C.

    It's called a "metropolitan area." It's connected not only by transportation systems but a myriad of other networks.

    When you jerk off with your left hand, the right hand knows what you're doing.

    Shut the fuck up w/ that, retard.

  13. oooooh someone hit a nerve

  14. Not at all. :) The Internet is for fun. I am going to smoke a joint. Have a good night, retard (that's your name from now on).

    Btw, it's actually called the Interstate "Highway" System.

  15. yeah, D.C. is D.C. is D.C.

    You're a dick, anonymous. don't you have a whole foods in tenleytown to patronize?

  16. MS-13 4 LIFE

  17. Can we assign number to anonymouses? I get confused when two of you get into a shouting match, hell, it could be three of you or more, beats me. I have just had a brainstorm, stay with me here. Why don't all you mouses pick a fake name for your post? Oh wait, we're talking DC here, top secret clearance, conspiracy theory for breakfast, I guess that won't work for you.

    I do want to apologize in advance for posting even though I don't currently live in DC, but guys, the traffic was murder.

  18. Next up, M@sshole is going to write a hate-filled post about northern virginia; because "DC is DC is DC"

    We're waiting. NOVA. Hate. Bring it.

    "You're a dick, anonymous. don't you have a whole foods in tenleytown to patronize?"

    Oh, that explains why you're constantly trying to wrap your lips around me. No, I just have a corner bodega and multiple liqour stores to patronize.

    Don't you need to meet your parents at the Cheesecake Factory in Arlington? You know how worried they are now that you live "in DC"...