Marc Fisher Is Better at Hating DC Than I Am

Just a delightful piece by Metro columnist Marc Fisher in the April 4th Washington Post.

To cut to the chase, some asshole subdivided his property, made a ton of money, and was planning on building a quote-unquote "McMansion" in the middle of AU Park (47th and Ellicott). I really don't have a problem with this, but I can understand why people would be upset. And people were upset. Neighbors put up signs showing their displeasure. But, in DC, you're not allowed to have signs on your lawn that aren't political in nature. Bureaucratic hilarity ensues.

Other than the red tape and the incompetence of government workers, both of which you should just accept as DC status quo at this point, this is troublesome for two reasons:

1. For a District that gets its panties all in a bunch about not having the same voting rights as other Americans, the city government doesn't seem to caught up in the rights of its own citizenry. This is pretty clearly covered by the First Amendment.

2. This is all about 5 blocks from me. So I live in AU Park? Ugh, that sounds like an honors dorm. Or even worse, one of those "wellness" dorms where no one drinks and people form study groups. I thought that AU Park was on the other side of AU, by Arizona Avenue. Or is that Foxhall? There's no way I'm telling my parents I live in "AU Park." Wicked lame.


  1. OH MY GOD RUSTY YOU ARE FROM BOSTON!!! Finally, finally someone understands my pain.

    FUCK DC!!!! UP THE ASS WITH A Corkscrew! Im a Masshole too- from Winthrop!

    Oh my God you have really made my day, week, month.
    Fuck this GHETTO SHITHOLE.

  2. Well, not "Boston" so much as "Cape Cod." So, no accent or anything.

    I am glad I made your day, week, and month. I am going for year next.

  3. When I first started reading, I thought to myself this kid has to be from Boston. HAS TO. Then I kept on reading and sure as shit I was right! I too was destined for law school (got accepted) and then decided not to go (Im holding out for something closer to Boston and more in human rights) and so I settled on the lame notion of working at a firm on 18th and M for the time being.

  4. I bet Nadia has a big Boston bush.

  5. It seems like 80% of the non-native DC population either came from Mass. or attended B.U. and then moved here. What up wit dat?

  6. Hey Nadia would you spread for Rusty?

  7. How exciting it is to find someone who's from Mass!! Now if only I could just meet someone from New Jersey, my cultural cup would runneth over!! That tommy friedman sure was right- globalization is awesome!!

  8. Anonymous #3, well played.

    Anonymous #2, not nice.

  9. Of course he's from Boston. He uses wicked to modify adjectives. Only Bostonians and shitheads do that.