7.18.2006

CRIME EMERGENCY Wrap-Up

Part I

I can't fucking believe this. Remember when Alan Senitt died and his murderers were apprehended the next day? The MPD did a pretty good job patting itself on the back. Even I was surprised at how effective our police officers were.

Naturally, the Metro Police Department fucked up super-royally and it cost Alan Senitt his life. They had the killers' address before Senitt's murder.

Here's my favorite excerpt:

Police responded by telling her [a previous victim] they could not get an arrest warrant without first doing surveillance at the apartment building and then conducting a lineup to determine whether she could identify suspects. She said she was sure she could identify her attackers and was waiting for a call from the police.

OK. I assume someone reading this knows a little something about Constitutional law. I've only taken a few Civil Liberties classes, so my expertise on the subject is a bit rusty (so to speak). But I'm pretty sure that the MPD is wrong. I would say that buying "male enhancement products" with a stolen credit card represents probable cause. By the way, any prosecutor can tell you that witness identification is incredibly unreliable, so I don't know what the officers were thinking there either.

At the very least, if you go in with a warrant and they have a stolen credit card and a handgun...that's two arrestable offenses right there. Alan Senitt lives.

Part II

The Andy Solberg foot-in-mouth incident is still getting a lot of press too. For anyone who forgot, he told 2nd District citizens that "This is not a racial thing to say that black people are unusual in Georgetown." He was immediately reassigned to Alaska*.

I responded to his comments by saying "If I had the opportunity to take back every stupid and/or offensive thing I ever said and replace it with something that made sense, I would be a happier man. Unfortunately, I can't do that. Neither can you, Mr. Solberg. I hope you get fired."

I laid the righteous indignation on so thick you can almost smell it coming off the screen. I should learn to take it down a few notches.

Still, the more I think about it, the more I hope he is severely disciplined. If not fired, then suspended without pay. There was an excellent DCist comment thread on this yesterday. Some defended Solberg. The gist of their argument was that Solberg was being attacked by the political correctness brigade. He was just saying what everyone else was thinking and what was known to be true.

That, of course, is absolutely ridiculous.

Because it's not true. I see black people in Georgetown all the time. Are they a minority? Of course. But Solberg's comment implied that seeing one black person in this affluent area is reason to be alarmed. That's indefensible and encourages whites to be fearful of blacks. Solberg is stoking racial tension. That's the last thing this city needs right now.

I was most disappointed by the thoughts of Marc Fisher. I was disappointed because, well, I kind of have a man-crush on him. He doesn't take Washington too seriously and he loves pointing out how silly the city can be. He is an awesome "must read" guy.

But his defense of Solberg was stupid**.

Solberg apologized for his "insensitive" and "inartful" comments, but that's not enough for those who are eager to see bias and to play gotcha.

I am not eager to see bias nor am I eager to play "gotcha." What Solberg said, even if he immediately regretted it, had the effect of making black people feel awkward and unwanted in white areas. That isn't good policing. That isn't commendable human behavior.

Then Fisher uses anecdotal evidence from Solberg's friends and neighbors. Solberg's black friends and neighbors. They say Solberg isn't racist. That may very well be true, but it doesn't really matter if he's racist or not. He said something racist at a time when everyone was hanging on his every word. I don't care if he's a good man. When the pressure was on, he fucked up. He may have been a "good cop" before, but his "inartful" comment has stripped that away.

*I stole that joke from Stripes. He was really reassigned to school security.
**The rest of Fisher's column is typically excellent. Only the Solberg part sucks.

31 comments:

  1. Krystal Koons (AKA THE PIMP DADDY)July 18, 2006

    Fucking comical. These stupid fucks use a stolen credit card to order something to their own fucking house!!!! What morons. And then the fucking cops dont do shit. Morons*1,000

    Fuck this shitty city.

    ReplyDelete
  2. As someone who lives over a 7-11 that many many many of DC's "Finest" frequent, I witness first hand several times a day their laziness. But maybe we should cut them a break...from the time they got the address from the mugging victim to the time of the Georgetown murder, the hot donut light NEVER went out at Krispy Kreme.

    This reminds me of the Simpson's Episode where Marge gets mugged and becomes scared to leave her house. She starts lifting weights and then goes out of the house, sees her attacker, and beats the hell out of him. Chief Wiggum says, "A citizen who caught his own attacker, the rest of you should be ashamed of yourselves for not doing the same." That's what we're down to - we have to apparently protect ourselves.

    Oh wait, I can't carry a gun in D.C.

    This city sucks. Like no other I've lived in. Truly.

    ReplyDelete
  3. Forget the DC crime epidemic, sounds like we got a moron police one.

    ReplyDelete
  4. So while all you guys were ROASTING in DC this weekend I was CHILLING in Boston on the beach, ten degrees cooler with a nice New England breeze, eatting canollis and teramisou from the North End. HA!

    ReplyDelete
  5. AnonymousJuly 18, 2006

    As a public relations type, I can't believe that a guy who has a job that is that RELATIVELY important (at least to the people he protects) would make such a gaffe.

    But then again, Bush's solution to the Mideast crisis is to tell Syria to get Hizbulloh to stop doing that "shit."

    If they all would just cut the shit, everything'd be fine.

    Quit screwing around!

    Btw, I saw plenty of blacks hangiing out in Georgetown this weekend. Gays, blacks. Everyone, it seemed, was popping their collars.

    ReplyDelete
  6. AnonymousJuly 18, 2006

    I hope you got some, Nadia!

    ReplyDelete
  7. this_shithole_sucksJuly 18, 2006

    Hey anonymous, you stupid fuck --

    That isn't Bush's solution. It was an off the cuff comment to a friend. So now Presidents aren't allowed to be human and use the word "shit"?

    Get a clue you dumbass fucking douchedrip.

    ReplyDelete
  8. this_shithole_sucksJuly 18, 2006

    Hey Rusty,

    Is it unusual for a child molestor to be seen walking around Georgetown? Oh wait - we wouldn't know that, now would we? Because a child molestor that has "paid his debt to society" should be free to fuck other little kiddies in the ass because we shouldn't be allowed to keep track of them when they get out of prison.

    ReplyDelete
  9. AnonymousJuly 18, 2006

    Hey, Shithole.

    You are a dumbass! Why the language?! I don't disagree w/ you. I mean, I voted for the sumbitch!

    I made that comment before I had my morning coffee. Jesus H. Christ. You're a real "touch hole."

    Are you having your period or did your boyfriend ram you too hard last night?

    ReplyDelete
  10. AnonymousJuly 18, 2006

    Shithole,

    You'd think one could point out that my comment was half-baked without the foul language. It was half-baked. Reading it now, it doesn't make logical sense.

    But with a name like Shithole, I'm not surprised. Is that your Christian name? Is your mother's first name "F-ckmy?"

    ReplyDelete
  11. AnonymousJuly 18, 2006

    I need to do some serious re-thinking if I'm seeing eye-to-eye with a shithole. I'm staring into the abyss.

    ReplyDelete
  12. this_shithole_sucksJuly 18, 2006

    "Sucks" is my last name, not "Shithole". So if my mother's name was "Fuckmy", her name would be Fuckmy Sucks, which doesn't make a whole lot of sense.

    My birth certificate says:

    Sucks, This Shithole

    That is my complete name.

    ReplyDelete
  13. AnonymousJuly 18, 2006

    I believe you, sir! Something tells me you might be a sailor.

    ReplyDelete
  14. Krystal Koons (AKA THE PIMP DADDY)July 18, 2006

    Hey anonymous and shithole: shut up.

    -Cowboy Bob Jenkins

    ReplyDelete
  15. AnonymousJuly 18, 2006

    When can we see pics of Nadia?

    ReplyDelete
  16. AnonymousJuly 18, 2006

    Contrary to what most people say, the most dangerous animal in the world is not the lion or the tiger or even the elephant. It's a shark riding on an elephant's back, just trampling and eating everything they see.

    ReplyDelete
  17. AnonymousJuly 18, 2006

    This is off topic, but someone else brought it up......

    The "forgot to turn the mike off" BS is the oldest PR trick in the book.

    You are FUCKING GULLIBLE is you really think that "Shit" wasn't planned.

    ReplyDelete
  18. AnonymousJuly 18, 2006

    Really? You think the brilliance that the Bush administration wanted to get out was that... Syria should get Hezbollah to just cut the shit?

    What purpose does that serve? Besides, would they really do that to their close ally Blair? He's getting the crap knocked out of him in the British press right now.

    You didn't hear about THAT, did you?

    ReplyDelete
  19. AnonymousJuly 18, 2006

    Krystal Koons,

    Always gotta add your two cents, don't you? I thought I smelled tuna fish....

    --Anonymous

    ReplyDelete
  20. AnonymousJuly 18, 2006

    What kind of setting do you suppose Nadia would use for her Hustler spread?

    I wonder if she has "Citgo" tattoed on her ass.

    ReplyDelete
  21. Krystal Koons (AKA THE PIMP DADDY)July 18, 2006

    Why don't all of you anonymous puke-spills use your real names, like me?

    -walker, texas ranger

    ReplyDelete
  22. AnonymousJuly 18, 2006

    RE: """Really? You think the brilliance that the Bush administration wanted to get out was that... Syria should get Hezbollah to just cut the shit?"""

    The purpose of the strategic "mike left on" PR move was to make a subliminal association between Lebanon, Syria, and Iran....

    Blair "drawing critisism" in British media coverage is also planned - none of it deal with the real issue. They are saying shit like

    "Meanwhile, President Bush's greeting of "Yo Blair" prompts the Guardian to ask whether this betrays a hint of disrespect in the relationship. "

    ReplyDelete
  23. AnonymousJuly 18, 2006

    Yes, and the governemt also planned 9/11, is hiding space aliens in Area 51, and is supressing knowledge of the colonel's secret recepie.

    ReplyDelete
  24. AnonymousJuly 18, 2006

    "The purpose of the strategic "mike left on" PR move was to make a subliminal association between Lebanon, Syria, and Iran...."

    Why would he need to make a subliminal association between those countries when there relationship has been well documented by the press for months?

    ReplyDelete
  25. AnonymousJuly 18, 2006

    Yeah, why would he need to go subliminal when he said OUTRIGHT today that that was the case?

    It just doesn't make sense. They wouldn't have gained much, if anything. And there was more than a perceived hint of disrespect with the "yo Blair" comment, bud. But you didn't read the full transcript did you? (If you reply, you'll read it beforehand and say you had already read it....)

    Blair offered to go to the Middle East to pave the way for Condi but was rebuffed by his friend (read: boss) George Bush.

    I don't think Blair would have signed on for that. Sometimes there's no conspiracy. Sometimes things are actually simpler than you might think....

    Btw, I believe the federal government's known about the colonel's recipe for some time now. They've just been biding their time before they smash KFC once and for all.

    Then they'll have a state monopoly on fried chicken. To believe otherwise is to be gullible.

    ReplyDelete
  26. AnonymousJuly 18, 2006

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=89voDGJXTlA&mode=related&search=Bush%20g8

    Dude, watch the video on YouTube or the link on NYTimes.com of the whole thing. Nice bit. Blair finally discovers the mic on and quickly moves to switch it off. Good actor, ay! Watch it and see what ya think.

    ReplyDelete
  27. this_shithole_sucksJuly 19, 2006

    Hey Krystal Koons (AKA THE PIMP DADDY):

    Go fuck yourself.

    ReplyDelete
  28. AnonymousJuly 19, 2006

    poll: did anyone actually read this post in its entirety?

    ReplyDelete
  29. AnonymousJuly 20, 2006

    Another post on race. DC bar post soon to follow.

    ReplyDelete
  30. AnonymousJuly 20, 2006

    I do like the tidbit in this story that the robbers have small penises.

    ReplyDelete