why.i.hate.dc

These people offend my sensibilities

A movie theater pulls the sniper video game "Silent Scope" from its lobby because it's sensitive about the D.C. sniper attacks... which ended seven months ago.

Removing the game is "a good idea," [random passerby Liz Hart] said, "because it's one more thing we can eliminate from being reminded of that whole incident. Whatever we can do to make Manassas life as good as it was, I'm all in support of that."

All right! Of course! We should completely eliminate the memory of any bad things that happened in our past. 9/11. Sniper attacks. Anthrax. Oh, who wants to think of such unpleasant things? Therefore, we should also immediately demolish the Pentagon and the Hart Senate office building, and Chief Moose should quit. Oh, one out of three already? Awesome.

Meanwhile, she also implies that Manassas life was good at some point in the past. And that it was those dastardly sniper attacks that made it bad. Whatever. Removing a fucking video game from a movie theater lobby isn't going to make Manassas any less of a suburban hellpit.

An Annapolis lawmaker is pushing to "ban children from playing outdoors with most toy guns and fine parents of the pistol-packing tots."

Lynn Golb, 70, said yesterday police officers are busy enough enforcing the law and they should not have to worry about children playing guns with their friends.

And using that logic, we should just impose a curfew on everyone.

(Or, you know, in both of these above cases, instead of targeting fake guns, how about doing something about the real guns instead? We so staunchly defend our right to real guns, which are actually dangerous, and outlaw the toy guns that hurt nobody. Does... not... fucking... compute.)

Oh, and this guy is complaining about a Metro bus ad that says "Traffic sucks."

"That word just has too many crummy connotations," Mr. Bishop says. "I think this is a problem with our society, a kind of anything-goes attitude. If that word is permissible, then what is next?"

Jesus H. Fucking Christ. Lighten up pal. It's not like it said "Traffic sucks my balls."