6.01.2004

If you didn't think the terrorists won before...

The Redskins closed sidewalk access along Redskin Road on game days a few years ago. Obviously the reason was money: making it more difficult for people to park for free at Landover Mall and walk to [product-placed shipping company] Field would force more of them to park at the $25 game-day "cash lots" set up by the team, and take long shuttle bus trips to the stadium.

The only problem is that this policy was decided on in a closed-door meeting and voided by a judge. Now, Prince George's County is still trying to restrict access by declaring that allowing people to walk on the sidewalk would be unsafe.

But that's not the real story here. The real story is this quote. Says it all. Coming up right here. Brace yourself:

"Post-9/11 we're no longer an open society," said Public Safety Director Vernon Herron, chairman of the panel. "These measures are absolutely critical for the safety of all who are in that stadium."
You heard it here first, folks. "Post-9/11, were no longer an open society."

Got that, everyone? You can forget about your wussy liberal "walking on the sidewalk" with your pot-smoking hippie friends! "For the safety of all who are in that stadium"-- nay, Mr. Herron, for the safety of democracy and American ideals everywhere-- NONE SHALL EVER USE THIS PEDESTRIAN SIDEWALK ON REDSKINS GAME DAYS AGAIN! FOR FREEEEEEDOMMMM!

I'm not sure, but I think this means that if the team puts up another losing season, Daniel Snyder gets to cut off Mark Brunell's hands.

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